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Thoughts Of Suicide

Confession: March 24th was going to be the end for me. Months with no car, pain, painful treatments, meds screwed up, isolated, low on cash...

Wednesday, January 7, 2015

Women & Car Repair: Some Things Never Change

Despite all the hype and hope for 2015, I am experiencing the "same old same old" when it comes to getting my car fixed. My car has only been in the shop since December so the 'new year' hasn't really gotten started I suppose but then again...neither has my car!!
My car is a Saturn and I needed a starter. I took it to a local shop and 'wouldn't you just know it'? Saturn has stopped making "my particular kind of starter." The mechanic had to go online and order it to be delivered. The mechanic said, "It doesn't take more than a day or two to get a part delivered and UPS is really good at bringing us our orders." Well, "wouldn't you just know it"? The earliest they could get the part I need was January 5th! Of course this was explained to me after I called to check on my car's 'status.' "Sorry Little Lady, there's nothing we can do 'til that ignition switch comes in but as soon as it does, we'll have you back on the road."
Wouldn't you just know it!
I always have bad luck when it comes to getting a car fixed. The parts aren't there, the 'only guy who could fix it is unavailable', it's almost the weekend or the problem is worse than they thought. I get the 'Little Lady' treatment and that patronizing smile whenever I tell mechanics what is wrong with my car. How dare I? THEY will decide "what's really going on" with my automobile. My cousin Frank never has this trouble. He goes in, tell the mechanics what to do and the work never takes more than a day. Wonder what his 'secret' is?
My cars also seem to breakdown around a major holiday. My last car trouble happened just before Labor Day so it shouldn't have been a shock when my car decided to conk out around Christmas/New Years but it was.  Like millions of people, my car is my only transportation so when I have to be without it, it is almost traumatic.  I am still getting chemotherapy and I had hopes of 'getting a break' from the universe so I wouldn't have to put the treatments on hold. (Pardon the self-pity there, please.) But alas, twas not to be. Besides, everybody's got their troubles, right?
So it's tick-tock and watch the clock.  Hours turn into days, days turn into weeks and still no car. Maybe the universe is trying to teach me patience.
Unfortunately, life kind of stops for me when I have no car. (Again, please pardon the self-pity) At least now when I call the shop I get an "any day now" or a "Just stay positive" from them. Stay positive? Yeah, right.  I can't even call in favors. Everyone I gave rides to, babysat for and took to their various appointments in the past is suddenly out of reach, sick or swamped. Don't you just hate when that happens? Whatever happened to "getting by with a little help from my friends"?


  1. Just sit back and enjoy the music, little lady. :)

  2. Piece of Shit Car - Sung by Adam Sandler

    Here we go
    no no no (whoo ooh)
    piece of shit car,
    i gotta piece of shit car

    that fucking pile of shit
    never gets me very far.

    my cars a big piece of shit
    cause the shocks are fucking shot,
    and my seatbelts fuckin broken,
    i got to tie em in a knot. (its a piece of shit)

    i cant see through the windshield
    cause its got a big fucking crack,
    and the interior smells real bad
    cause my friend puked in the back. (its a piece of shit)

    (piece of shit car) piece of shit car
    (hes gotta piece of shit car)
    it sucks royal dick (that fuckin pile of shit, never gets him very far)
    oh fuck you car.

    its got no CD player,
    its only got the 8-track.
    whoever designed my car
    can lick my sweaty nut sack. (they can bite his ass too)

    and i got no fucking brakes,
    im always way out of control,
    11 times a day i hear "hey watch it asshole" (you fucking piece of shit).

    (piece of shit car)
    i've got a piece of shit car (hes got a piece of shit car).
    diesel gas sucks my ass! (that fucking pile of shit)
    that pile of metal shit (never gets him very far.)

    oh what the fuck did i do,
    what the fuck did i do,
    what the fuck did i do,
    to get stuck with you?

    you're too wide for drive-thru
    and you smell like the shoe,
    but im too broke to buy something new.
    ah fuck me.

    the engine likes to flood,
    the car always fucking stalls,
    and the seat cushions got a big rip
    so a spring always pokes the balls. (ouch ouch ouch)

    plus the doorlocks are busted,
    i got to use a fucking coat hanger. (what a pain in his ass)
    and if a girlie sees my car,
    theres no chance i'll ever bang her. (he'll never ever get the pussy)
    hey shut up!

    (piece of shit car)
    you piece of shit car. (hes gotta piece of shit car)
    you piece of shit car (piece of shit car)

    bald fucking tires (hes got a piece of shit car)
    no rearview fucking mirror (piece of shit car)
    7 different colors (hes got apiece of shit car)
    fucking rag for a gas cap (piece of shit car)
    tailpipe making sparks fly everywhere (piece of shit car)
    whoaaaa the whole town thinks im a loser (piece of shit car)
    cabbie give me a push!

  3. No Woman, No Drive.
    Follow the link to watch this music video.